Had a not so late night phone call last night from T...around 9 pm our time.  It was not the phone call we were waiting for.  It was not the "let's do the baby dance" phone call.  It was one of those disappointing ones.  She had made a call to her Shanghai contact and was told that there would be no baby this month...not in this group of referrals.  I wanted to cry.

 

I kept searching for the right words for her and they seemed stuck in my throat somewhere.  I could not find them.  T was so positive in her thoughts about it.  I was so proud of the woman she has become.  She once told me that our expectations can bring our greatest disappointments and sorrows in life.  I try to remember that when I have expectations and every time, she is so right.  She is a wise woman and will make a wonderful mother.  These little girls out there waiting are so fortunate to have a mommy and daddy like T & D waiting for them. 

 

And so, we wait another month for these little munchkins.  We can only pray that the month of April flies by fast and that they are on the referral list for the end of April.  There is a reason.  We don't know what it is.  It could be something as simple as a paper stuck somewhere it shouldn't be.  It could be a document that really needs to be updated and without it the process would not go smoothly.  It could simply be that there are not enough clouds in the sky today.  I really don't know.  I can only fall to my knees and pray that they are safe, warm and loved wherever they are waiting. 

 

Hang on little ones...your ma ma and ba ba will be there as soon as the people who hold the power can process all the mounds of paper work. 

 

NOTE:  No picture.  I could not think of one that would show what disappointment looks like. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You have to love this picture.  It is beautiful.  The little girl, the pig, the butterfly, the reg thread and the flowers. 

 

Well, it is 2007...the year of the pig in China.  The golden pig they say.  Does that mean our baby girl(s) will have a lot of good fortune and be all the things that this Chinese New Year is to bring?  Or, because they were most likely born in 2006, does this mean they are born in the year of the dog?  Most likely it means the year of the dog.  However, I know that they will have good fortune no matter what, because they will have parents who will love them more than the all the stars in the sky.  They will have grand parents who will love them fiercely.  They will have uncles and aunts and cousins and friends around the world, who will encircle them with more love than the highest number. 

 

So bring on the pigs...bring on the dogs...bring on the stars in the sky.  Little ones...your good fortune will come from the people that love you and all the wonderful experiences you will have in life.

 

 

There is a legend in the Chinese Adoption World that a lady bug is a symbol of good luck and that referrals are on their way.  A referral is the moment all prospective parents wait for.  They get a picture and information about the baby or babies (if twins) that has been chosen for them. 

 

Well, I have been calling those lady bugs.  See the pictures.  I have two lady bugs that sit on my computer monitor and the other lady bugs are in our roses.  Okay...so I cheated a little bit there.  I bought the lady bugs at Home Depot and deposited them into the rose bushes.  I have sent them on their way to China with a prayer that referrals come out next week or the following at the latest.  The following week, the first week of April is Holy Week.  What a wonderful Easter present that would be.

 

So fly away, fly away little lady bugs.  Fly onto China and the CCAA.  Let those referrals fly onto all the ma ma's and ba ba's out there. 

 

Bless you little lady bugs wherever you are.

What on earth do these two things have in common, you say?  Let me tell you…

 

There is a Giraffe named Daisy.  She was won by a young man in 1965 for a young woman he had just begun to date.  The young woman loved the giraffe and kept Daisy on her bed as a reminder of that auburn haired man who won it for her.  The young woman married the young man the next year and Daisy made her way to a bed in an apartment on Atwood Street in Pittsburgh.  Daisy happily stayed there for 18 months.  At the end of those 18 months the young woman and young man moved to New York, where they soon found themselves decorated a small bedroom for a baby to be born toward the end of 1968.  Once the crib made it’s way into this room, Daisy found herself in the corner awaiting that baby.

 

Well, that baby was born.  She was a baby girl.  Her room was yellow and Daisy fit right in with her yellow body and brown spots.  The baby girl loved her and played with her for years.  As you can see by the picture, all those years of love made their mark.  Her neck is floppy, her body and spots are faded.  She was much loved, like the Velveteen Rabbit.  The baby girl had two younger brothers who contributed to the great love Daisy experienced. 

 

For many years now, Daisy has been snuggled down in the corner of an old truck awaiting the arrival of grand children in the home of that young man and young woman, now much older.  It wasn’t until the other night when the late night phone call came that she came out to sit on the bed again.

 

Now late night phone calls are not something one normally wants to get.  If you are the parent of a teenager, you want to run down the hall and make sure your children are all snuggled into their beds before you even answer the phone.  We can relate to this – having had a couple of those in the 1980’s.  No names will be mentioned, in order to protect the innocent??  With family across the country, we always worry about bad news from there as well.  So…why didn’t I have that dread when I heard the phone ring the other night?  My first thought was…maybe it is T or D calling to let us know they got their referral on the baby(s) for the adoption.  It was 4:30 a.m. and I quickly picked up the phone to hear a male voice with other noise in the background.  I immediately said, “hello” with no immediate reply.  I continued to say, “hello, hello, hello” – thinking we had a bad connection.  Finally, I recognize the voice that says, “well, this is a surprise, you calling me in Africa”.  My reply, “well, this isn’t a surprise, you calling me from Africa”.  My brother-in-law is in Africa.  He said, “I didn’t call you” and I said, “well, I didn’t call you”.  I wanted to add, “heelloo, it is 4:30 in the morning, why would I be calling you in Africa”?  After a quick, “how’s the trip going” and “the trip is great” and “we’ll talk when we get back”, we hung up.  I’m still not sure how this mysterious phone call happened.  As I laid my disappointed head back down on my pillow, I somehow thought of Daisy and where she was and where she should be.  I don’t know call me crazy, but a call from Africa at 4:30 in the morning when you are waiting for a call announcing the arrival of grand children from China makes perfect sense to me.